After years of trying to conceive, and heaps of money wasted on internet scams to increase fertility, (and energy blown on mentally blaming Donovan - there HAD to be something wrong with HIM, because there's NOTHING wrong with me!); after having a 35lb cyst in my abdomen discovered and removed in Sept 2006, and after having been told I have permanent damage on my left fallopian tube, and thinking I would need to depend solely on fertility drugs to help us produce the baby we've been waiting a long time for, here I sit, July 17, 2007, 16 1/2 wks pregnant!
16 1/2 weeks pregnant!
On April 30th, I had the day off of work, and was bored. "I haven't had my period yet," I thought, without thinking I actually was pregnant. I mean, how many times in the past had I been SURE I was pregnant, and took the test, only to have a negative result? And then I'd go out and blow another $20 on another test to take, convinced the first one was wrong....only to see another negative result, and I'd go out and drop even MORE money. THAT'S how sure I was.
It was a vicious cycle, every month, for a long time.
So this time, I didn't think I could actually BE pregnant. I mean, aside from a bit of fatigue, I didn't really FEEL any different.
"Ah, what the heck", I thought, "I'll cave and buy the darn test."
Almost instantaneously after peeing on the stick, the little pink cross appeared.
I'm PREGNANT?
I waited an hour, took the second test. Same result!
I'M PREGNANT!!!!
I called the doctor, made an appointment for the next day, and then Donovan called. He asked if he could take me out for dinner that night. How sweet!
And the place he wanted to take me - Elephant & Castle - the first restaurant we ever went to together, where we first "hooked up". We hadn't been there in YEARS, so for him to suggest we go there blew my mind! Subconciously, he must have had a sneaking suspicion his life was about to change, and he wanted to be in the same place he was when our lives first intertwined. What better place to announce the new path our lives were going to take together than that?!
I wrapped the test in tissue paper, filled out the card that I had sitting in my drawer for over a year (that I purchased specifically for this moment), and met him at the restaurant. I told him that I had some bad news for him, hence the gift bag (to "soften the blow"). That confused him, just like I had planned! He started to read the card...thinking I set fire to all his Ottawa Senators gear or did something horrible, I told him to stop reading the card right before he got to the part about us being pregnant....I told him to look in the gift bag.
"A measuring spoon?" he asked curiously, seeing only half the test poking through. And as the test fell from the tissue paper, he asked "A thermometer?" He'd never seen a pregnancy test before, so he didn't know what he was looking at!
"Finish reading the card," I told him. He did. His eyes got big. He looked up at me - "Is this a joke? This isn't funny, don't joke about this!" he said. This was the one thing that was sacred, we'd been trying too hard for too long, had gone through too many obstacles to make a mockery of our efforts. He was in shock.
"This isn't a joke, Daddy!" I said - the "bad news" was that we couldn't wrestle around and play as rough as we did before!
His eyes welled up with tears, and he jumped up from the other side of the booth, pretty much scooped me up too, and there we were, in the middle of the E&C, hugging, crying, and laughing.
It's a moment I'll never forget.
That was at 5 1/2 wks. And now I'm 16 wks pregnant.
This journey is going too quickly!
We heard the heartbeat 2 weeks ago. That pretty much sealed the deal for me - all I was going on was pee on a stick, and cleavage the size of Texas! I needed confirmation that I had a baby growing inside, and there was the heartbeat.
Another moment I'll never forget.
And the third great adventure so far with Baby Yaciuk - last week, for the second time, I've felt our baby move.
Just a flutter, a few little bubbles of a carbonated beverage - caught me off guard! First time I felt a flutter was at 3 months. "That's too soon, it must've been gas," they told me. But my mom knew it was more than that when I told her. "That was your baby," she said, as her eyes filled up with tears.
And it was my baby! And I felt my baby move again just last week! A little Ukrainian dancer, we have!
17 weeks is coming up this Saturday. I can't wait to see what else Baby Yaciuk has in store for us!
This time is moving far too quickly, but I'm pleased to report, I'm enjoying every moment of it. I love taking care of my baby, and I can't wait to meet him!
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